I was chatting with the lovely and talented proprietress of Explore Your Feminine Side the other day. This talented M2F transformation specialist does my makeup and provides gentle guidance on walking and other feminine mannerisms from time to time. She asked me what was keeping me busy. I said that I was spending a good bit of time writing.
She said "but that can’t be as much fun as dressing is it?". To which fair point I could only say yes, but I can be Petra online in a mere 20 minutes.
It takes me at least 2 hours to transform in the real world. Additionally, I can clean out my browser cache in the blink of an eye where lord knows I have managed to leave pumps and tights out in the real world full view of people who might be surprised at their sudden appearance.
To her credit, she is of course correct. There is nothing in the world that satisfies the want to dress like dressing itself.
But it is also true that time and circumstances do not allow most of us the freedom to be occupied en femme at will. And so back to the writing thing.
It has been interesting and surprisingly satisfying to write and think from Petra’s perspective recently. This represents a nurturing of a dimension of myself that is simply not going to go away. Even if I did want it to. And nurturing is healthier than whatever the opposite is.
I have joined a handful of terrific virtual sororities along the way, including crossdresserclub.com and crossdressers.com. These online societies provide an opportunity for people inclined like we are to know that we are far, far from alone. And that comfort is wonderful. Additionally though, they provide a platform for listening, thinking and responding with written words.
Clicking keyboards instead of clicking heels.
Some of the forum posts that I see are hurriedly written and coarsely considered. The written equivalent of “panic dressing”. These however, are exceptions. For the most part the thoroughness of thought, elegance of expression and sincerity of care I see expressed in CD/TG forum threads is outstanding. It seems to me that the best parts of our other selves really shine online.
There is an unselfish, empathetic quality to the responses to the triumphs, troubles and trivia that constitute most of the forum threads that is (watch out … stereotype iceberg directly ahead .... steer hard, hard dammit to port!) essentially feminine.
If you are not a part of such an online sisterhood, you are missing a real chance to develop and nurture your femme self. And in the nurturing, I suspect that, like me, you may find yourself in better control of these powerful, compelling forces. Forces that have the strength to ambush us, sometimes inconveniently, when we do not pay attention to them.
It takes less time than even a partial wardrobe swap. It costs less than a set of press on nails. You will learn things along the way of huge value. And from time to time a true friend can emerge from the jostling crowds.
So go do that. Or if you have been absent from your online sorority for a while, go back, pull up a chair, smooth your skirt out, and say hello.
And for those of you reading this post with any thoughts you want to share here, comments and indeed Guest Editorials are entirely welcome. Don’t hesitate to drop me a line with your thoughts. Especially if you want to introduce your sorority.
Happy dressing, virtual and otherwise.