Nov 29, 2008

O, for a pair

The leg-centric photos you see peppered throughout my blog maybe, kind of, sort of tell you a little about my obsessions. Feminine territory south of the equator has always been right at the core of my imaginings and explorations. That said, we are Mammals, and as such, are drawn, to one degree or another by, well, the Mams. And yes, this leg fan has a special place in mind for breasts.

They are warm, yielding, responsive, symmetrical, ever present and usually out of reach. They hide. I seek. I want to watch them, touch them, taste them. And I want a pair of my own.

Young(er) Petra experimented. Balled up socks. Rolled up panty hose. Rice poured into sheer knee-highs. Wrong, all wrong.

Middle aged Petra has more choice and experience. And a little more budget too. And access to a terrific world of online shopping possibilities. Easiest thing on the planet these days to Google up breast forms, land up on
Suddenly Fem, Glamour Boutique, or a host of others, and drop anywhere between $150 and $300 for a spectacular pair of silicon breasts. There are a couple of problems though:
  1. Even in a plain brown wrapper, it is difficult for me to be certain that I would be at home to intercept the delivery. My wife of many years past, and hopefully many years ahead would have some really pointed questions for me. and

  2. I have some chest hair I cannot find a plausible excuse to shave off. Which means I can get the shape, but how o how to organize the cleavage?

    I came really really close this autumn, and want to explain how to you. Pour a glass of wine and take a moment with me. I had our home empty for a few weeks, and Petra just took my hand and got busy.

A couple of years ago, I experimented with Liquid Latex Mold material. Terrific stuff. About $12.00 a jar, available at Michaels Craft Stores. Order on-line, or (if your inner Petra orders you around too, just go to the nearest store – always yield to that voice if you know what’s good for you…).

So, this stuff requires patience. It needs to be brushed into the mold in thin, thin and even coats. The coats require ample drying time. Keep a hair dryer handy. You will get the hang of it in time. To get the right balance between durability and flexibility, 6-8 coats has worked for me. While you are coating the bust form, be sure to be making a 12” x 12” square of the same material with the same number of coats. You will cut and use these parts to seal the breast cavity later.

Now, the surface color of the material when it dry’s out is an unattractive jaundiced yellow. Not exactly a come-hither look. No problems. Liquid foundation is the solution. Don’t worry about using up the expensive name brand stuff here. Just match your own complexion with really cheap,
Sally Beauty Supply stuff (or go to Target or wherever). Pour in and dilute. Assuming a kind of pale Caucasian complexion, the latex should be lighter then your skin tone. It will dry slightly darker.

Extra bonus points no matter what way you do this. En Femme, and its just another terrific day out. In drab, and you are making one of those peculiar purchases that you can either stammer away …” its for my girlfriend”, or you can say nothing (most often) or just for the total thrill of it, you can say “ this is for me… is it any good? You might make a new friend.

Now, what to mold it into? Easier than you think. Wherever you live there is a store fixture shop. Here in Atlanta, there is a company called
Bland Enterprises. Just outside the perimeter on Jimmy Carter. Believe it or not, you can get a nice plastic female bust form for under $20.00. Now, a quick qualifying note. If you are a full figured girl, you may need to look further afield. You are resourceful – go hunting. For me, the typical bust form is about perfect in size. I wear a 34C. The downside for me is I have a hard time shopping for men’s clothing. Ah well.

So, paint on the inside, up to the neck line, out to the ribs, right to the arm holes. You are making a half-body mold. It can get a little tricky. It took me some experimenting and some failure. It will for you too. Here we go:

  1. Fill and seal one breast at a time. You will need to adjust the tilt of the bust form (laying face down) in order to get maximum fill. The latex mold is good enough. I have some other suggestions at the end.

  2. Seal the filled breast as air-tight as possible with the spare latex sheet you have been building. You will need to approximate the shape and cut a template with a little guesswork.

  3. Paint the edges over with the latex mold to ensure a tight seal. 3 coats before repeating the process on the 2nd breast.

Now, you have a front half. You need a back half. Find the best supporting bra you have. Or go on a new shopping adventure. Flesh tone, wide shoulder strap, 3 row, 3 column back-closure bra. And go ahead ... tell the nice lady its for you. JCPenny is great value for bras. And the girls in the lingerie department have been so nicely flustered by me, I can barely stand it.

And now, disassemble the bra. That’s right, separate the front from the back. Super-glue the back half to the natural meeting places on your new front-half. Presto.

Slide arms through holes, pull up close to your neck, clasp in back, and behold thy lovely shape. Now you are not finished yet unless you are an absolute genius. Next steps as follows:

  1. You may need to adjust the fill for more fullness. In fact, count on it. Go to Krogers. Buy a pastry nozzle kit for $2.00. Cut a small incision on the inside of each breast and squeeze full to capacity. Patch the incision with some of your scrap (super-glue is the right stuff) paint a couple of coats over it, and yum. Ready to jiggle.

  2. You may need to trim away excess latex. Sharp exacto knife on a hard cutting surface. Do not trim on the plastic bust form.

Now, then. I got some great reviews on my shape. But was disappointed in a couple of ways. Bad news first.

Issue 1. Using the latex mold material as breast fill material made my new parts just a little too firm. I really wanted more jiggle. Additionally, my breasts did not create the desired cleavage even under pressure some a serious Victoria’s Secret padded underwire miracle number.

Solution: Next time I am going to use a liquid soap. I think it will remain a little more fluid.

Issue 2. I had slightly uneven breast swell line at the top. I think this was down to the way I sealed the cavities.
Solution: I am going to use transparent plastic next time rather then the cut latex sheet. I think this will diminish the stress felt underneath the “skin” that causes imperfect lift and cleavage appearance.

I got a lot of really positive reviews on the shape from some real experts. Anna and Becky up at everyones favorite CD friendly foundation garment shop the

Lingerie Mart in Alpharetta were totally impressed. I had cocktails with some really nice women who prefer the company of women (surely, Lesbians have got to be the real authorities on breasts …. correct?) who thought I had done great work.

My own
transformation consultant was encouraging but not so impressed. Again, the feel was just too too firm. I am going to try the traditional glue-on silicon forms the next time we get together just to see what I am up against.

I feel as though I attempted to climb Mr. Everest, and just ran out of oxygen a couple of hundred feet shy of the summit. I will climb again and build the perfect breast some day soon. I really believe it is possible to have a look similar to these beauties on the right, and elsewhere in my imagination. If you have similar stories, mis-haps, advice or want to share with me your stories of getting the real deal done (silicon injections that is), I would be thrilled to hear from you.

Please feel free to work on this method and improve it where you can. I hope you get great results. I really felt better, more attractive and more natural out en femme then ever before in part as a result of all of this thinking and effort. It would please me greatly if you get the same feeling too.

Best - Petra

1 comment:

Treacle said...

Oh my gosh...did you seriously just write a guide on how to make your own breast forms? I don't mean to pressure, but you have to submit this somewhere. I'm sure there are lots of other people who want to learn this skill.

 
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